Coping Through the Holidays: A Guide for Bulimia Nervosa
The holidays can be a stressful time of year for everyone, especially individuals with eating disorders. With holiday gatherings primarily revolving around food, every aspect of these festive feasts can be difficult. There are many different tools to help navigate the holidays, reduce stress and anxiety, and avoid potential triggers surrounding food if you are struggling with Bulimia Nervosa.
By: Anna Capetola
Bulimia Nervosa is characterized primarily by a cycle of binge eating followed by compensatory behaviors, such as self-induced vomiting, in an attempt to counteract the effects of binge eating. Symptoms include regular intake of large amounts of food accompanied by a sense of loss of control over-eating behavior. Use of inappropriate compensatory behaviors such as self-induced vomiting, laxative or diuretic abuse, fasting, and/or obsessive or compulsive exercise, and extreme concern with body weight and shape are also characteristic of Bulimia Nervosa.
Before the Holidays: Plan Ahead
Speak with your therapist and dietitian about any concerns you may be experiencing related to the upcoming holiday.
Think about where you plan to spend the holiday and who you plan to spend it with.
Ask yourself if you will need to rearrange your meals and snacks if you plan to attend a social event.
Depending on where you are in recovery, it is important to stick with your meal plan. Remember that it’s okay if you need to eat at different times than the people around you. Your needs are valid and important!
If you’re worried about having to eat challenging foods, try incorporating these foods into your meal before the holiday.
Don’t be ashamed to ask the host what foods they will be preparing. A lot of people ask these questions.
You can also ask the host who will be attending if you’re concerned about eating in front of others. This can help to reduce anxiety by eliminating an element of surprise.
Think about how the food will be served.
If it’s buffet style, it could be helpful to have someone help you portion your food out.
Talk to your supports.
Don’t be afraid to communicate your wants and needs with your support team before the holiday.
Having someone who’s familiar with your eating disorder with you on the holidays can help hold you accountable. Your supports can also help you cope with your feelings if a situation becomes too overwhelming. If you’re worried this will happen, try creating a code word with your support person to alert them if you’re feeling uncomfortable or triggered in any way.
Practice self-care.
Treat yourself with the love and respect you deserve.
Try journaling, taking a bath, listening to soothing music, watching your favorite TV shows or movies, reading a good book, etc.
Don’t be afraid to say no
If you feel like you’re not ready to eat socially yet, don’t be afraid to say no. You can make a plan to eat before the event and join the holiday festivities afterward.
In the Moment
If unhelpful comments are made during the meal, don’t be afraid to set boundaries or to redirect the conversation. Again, your needs are important and valid!
Feel free to remove yourself from the environment for a moment if you feel you need some time to gather yourself and your thoughts.
While you step away, practice deep breathing strategies to help ground yourself before reentering the group.
Use the code word you created with your support-person, so they can help you get through the meal.
Engage in distracting conversations or games, so your attention and energy aren’t solely focused on the food in front of you. This can help take the pressure off of the situation.
Remember that your eating disorder will make it feel like everyone is watching you eat, but most of the time, others will not be focused on your eating.
After the Meal
Continue to engage in distracting conversations, play a game, watch a movie, etc. This will help keep your mind off the food you consumed.
Once you’ve completed your meal, it could be helpful to ask the people you’re sitting with to move to another table without food on it. Or if everyone could clear the food off the table.
Try to remain with the group, especially if you are having the urge to use compensatory behaviors. Remember that your support-person can help to hold you accountable.
Rethink the situation using positive affirmations:
“This too shall pass.”
“I will be OK.”
“It won’t last forever.”
“I will make it out of this.”
“I’m doing the best I can.”
If you’re looking for extra recovery support during the holidays, BALANCE is offering Winter Break Virtual Support for College and High School Students, with several flexible short-term intensive programming options. All of our programs are offered in a virtual format and will be open on a rolling admissions basis with individualized treatment plans tailored to one's schedule during the holiday season. Click the button below for more information!
This post was written by BALANCE Social Work Intern, Anna Capetola.
Anna is a second-year graduate student at New York University pursuing her Master’s in Social Work. She completed her undergraduate education at Quinnipiac University, majoring in psychology and minoring in sociology. She previously worked for Vibrant Emotional Health, formerly known as The Mental Health Association of NYC, where she conducted assessments, provided short-term counseling, and offered crisis intervention services to individuals who were struggling with an array of mental health and substance use concerns. Anna also has experience working with the Traumatic Brain Injury population, as well as individuals diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease and Autism Spectrum Disorder. She is devoted to learning about the mind-body connection, health, and overall wellness. She is deeply passionate about eating disorder awareness and recovery. Anna believes everyone has the right to feel supported, accepted, understood, valued, and cared for.