Breaking the Myth of Not Being Sick Enough to Have an Eating Disorder
A common concern of individuals with eating disorders is that they are not “sick enough” to pursue recovery. This idea is promoted by mainstream stereotypes of eating disorders (thin, white, and female). It is also reinforced by doctors and nurses who harbor biases following these stereotypes. But you do not have to be “sick enough” to recover – you are deserving of recovery as you are.
By: Samreen Khan
An eating disorder mindset will often convince you that you are not “sick enough” to pursue recovery. This can mean different things for different people; for some, the concept of “sick enough” may correspond with a certain weight or size, such as being “underweight” on the BMI scale. For others, it may entail engaging in disordered eating behaviors for a certain time or receiving validation from external sources. Whichever way it manifests, this idea of being “sick enough” is ultimately a misconception that your eating disorder only uses to constrain you to a lifetime of illness.
The reality is that you will never be sick enough for your eating disorder. Your eating disorder wants you to give in to its voice forever, so there is no point at which it will finally be satisfied – no matter how low your weight, how much you eat, or how long you have suffered, there will always turn out to be a way to be “sicker” than you already are. Chasing the inscrutable ideal of “sick enough” is like chasing the end of a rainbow.
Unfortunately, these thoughts are only reinforced by stereotypes that reduce eating disorders to illnesses that primarily affect thin, white women who restrict their food intake. Not only does the media portray this particular image of eating disorders, as seen in countless movies and TV series even in the past decade, but healthcare workers also succumb to these misconceptions. This makes it even more difficult for those who do not feel “sick enough” to get diagnosed and receive the treatment they need, especially those struggling who are at a “normal weight” or “overweight” according to the BMI scale. Non-white and non-female patients are also underdiagnosed and disregarded. Similarly, individuals suffering from eating disorders that are not anorexia or bulimia are often invalidated by doctors who do not view their illnesses as severe enough for treatment or diagnosis¹.
This invalidation from external sources can make it incredibly difficult to believe that you do not have to reach a certain point to pursue recovery. But you are deserving of recovery regardless of these factors. You are worthy of healing whenever food begins to feel like an enemy. You do not have to be of a specific size, gender, or race to deserve recovery.
Comparing yourself to others with eating disorders can contribute to these feelings. Your eating disorder is not a competition, even though it may feel like one at times. There will always be someone “sicker” than you. This is not a game of survival of the sickest – anyone suffering from disordered eating deserves to pursue a healthy relationship with food and their body at any point in their journey. Challenge the disordered thoughts by asking yourself what comparison will do for you. What, ultimately, do you gain by becoming “sicker?” Perhaps the momentary gratification of satisfying an eating disorder urge, but with that, you lose innumerable experiences that come with recovering.
There is no such thing as “sick enough” because you will never be enough for your eating disorder at all. Your eating disorder does not want you ever to recover, which is why it is crucial to contradict these thoughts. You do not have to be at rock bottom to recover; recovery is viable for anyone struggling to establish a healthy relationship with food. Wishing to be sicker is, in itself, indicative of being sick.
Join us Saturday, March 12th at 2:00 pm EST for our Anorexia In All Bodies webinar featuring therapy intern and founder of The Lovely Becoming, Mimi Cole. BALANCE founder & CEO Melainie Rogers and dietitian Quinn Haisley will join Mimi to discuss how anorexia is experienced across all body sizes and backgrounds. Together, they will debunk stereotypes of anorexia portrayed by culture and media, provide tools for self-advocacy, and validate the experience of not feeling “sick enough.” Click here to save your spot!
This post was written by BALANCE Blog Contributor, Samreen Khan (she/her/he/him).
Samreen is a senior high school student with an ardent drive to de-stigmatize mental illness and eating disorders. Born and raised in the Bay Area, she experienced the harmful effects of “fitspo” culture firsthand for most of her childhood. Throughout her own recovery journey, she became passionate about deconstructing diet culture and raising awareness about eating disorders in her everyday life. Samreen began extending her own ideology of intuitive eating and body neutrality to others by publishing her own writing online when she was fourteen, and has since received several awards for her prose and poetry. She has conducted research on the biological and evolutionary implications of familial mental illness, and is currently taking college-level Sociology and Psychology courses with hopes to delve further into the social and cultural constructs that bolster disordered eating, especially within marginalized communities. She’s grateful for the opportunity to combine two of her strongest passions — writing and mental health — by working with BALANCE!
References
Sonneville, K. R., and S. K. Lipson. “Disparities in Eating Disorder Diagnosis and Treatment According to Weight Status, Race/Ethnicity, Socioeconomic Background, and Sex among College Students.” International Journal of Eating Disorders, vol. 51, no. 6, 2018, pp. 518–526., https://doi.org/10.1002/eat.22846.